June 2012
69 posts
Jun 1st
2,904 notes
1 tag
Dear Tumblr,
I can’t (won’t) partake in today’s overshare-fest because, well, a lot of reasons.  But I think you are all awesome.  Really. Just to prove it, I’ll go ahead and let you know that I have a killer lady-bits situation going on that has required not only a mid-day trip to the Urgent Care clinic yesterday, but also a prescription 3x as strong as the normal dose today.  At...
Jun 1st
10 notes
May 2012
89 posts
In hour #6 of a deposition with a pro se...
Wow.
May 31st
4 notes
1 tag
May 31st
12 notes
Today is shaping up to be a pretty bad hump day.
Hope your Wednesday is better than mine.
May 30th
4 notes
1 tag
Let's play Dream Plate.
My sister and I invented a game this past weekend.  It’s called Dream Plate.  And it’s not really a game. Or an invention. You just talk about what you want to eat right now.  You can pick as many things as you want because the dream plate is infinitely big.
May 30th
4 notes
3 tags
Facebook- help?
After one too many please-gag-me posts on News Feed this weekend, I’m going to take one step closer to freedom from Facebook.  I want to increase my (already private) privacy settings and do some massive “friend” slashing, but I’m still going to keep my account.  You know, for emergency stalking purposes. Does anyone know how I delete my entire wall up to this point (both...
May 29th
2 notes
Southwest lines.
I could probably dedicate an entire blog to the behavior of Southwest passengers attempting to get in those god forsaken boarding lines. My first entry would be about the freaks who are stuck in kindergarten and need to be at their EXACT numbered position in line. They are a different breed of people altogether.
May 28th
3 notes
May 28th
1,323 notes
Starbucks, mani/pedis, beers at the pool on the...
It would be okay to do this daily.
May 26th
3 notes
May 25th
438 notes
May 25th
21 notes
May 25th
33,768 notes
Two inappropriate bus activities:
(I have written about both before.) Listening to music on your phone OUT LOUD on speaker aka without headphones. ??? Eating McDonald’s. ???
May 25th
6 notes
The best kind of flights
are the ones that take me to my sister! Happy long weekending, kids.
May 25th
9 notes
3 tags
May 25th
6 notes
May 24th
3 notes
An email from my grandfather:
“zoe i’mlooking forward to seeing you. As youknow i.m alittle under the weather, but we.ll have a good time together. love beba” All smushed together in one line, just like this. How cute are these kind of emails?  ps: “a little under the weather” = he just got home after THREE WEEKS in the hospital.  Can’t wait to see him!
May 24th
9 notes
Pooping at work.
It’s awkward. For all parties involved. Why do stalls still exist?
May 24th
5 notes
You know you are a loser when
you’re watching an episode of Triple D that you have seen at least 3 times before.
May 23rd
1 note
May 23rd
660 notes
May 23rd
1,074 notes
My sister just DEACTIVATED her Facebook account.
I may need to follow suit?
May 23rd
6 notes
May 22nd
1 note
IT'S ALMOST LUNCH TIME
(highlight of the day, obviously)
May 22nd
1 note
“Just for today Do not get angry Do not worry Be thankful Work hard Be kind...”
– Five Rules of Life (Mikao Usui via Swanfeather Songs)
May 22nd
2,657 notes
Also
my friend Jill at work told me Zantac (not to be confused with Xanax) is a miracle hangover cure. Have we heard this, Tumblr? True? False?
May 21st
2 notes
1 tag
May 21st
4 notes
May 21st
113 notes
Moments that make me laugh out loud:
When I’m in 7-eleven buying a soda and a big woman marches in, straight up to the hot dog roller-thingy and yells at the top of her voice, across the entire store, without even pausing to look around for a full second: WHERE DA BUNS? YA’LL AIN’T GOT NO BUNS? HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO EAT A HOT DOG WITHOUT A BUN?!
May 21st
6 notes
2 tags
Today felt like summer:
-crepes outside in the sun at noon -shopping on Walnut St. (cardigans and work tops, new jean shorts, 2 necklaces from Banana, a scarf, and other things I probably definitely didn’t need) -a nap (2 hours! mmm) -a run -huge salad & beers, followed by gelato, all outside -amazing people watching (the best was the 3 year old girl getting gelato with her dad and baby brother.  inside...
May 21st
2 notes
May 21st
2 notes
May 20th
5 notes
Positive things about Chris travelling:
I can turn on the air conditioning as high as I want and be freezing cold and sleep diagonally in the bed.  YES. 
May 19th
5 notes
Cheeseburger coma.
Normal people don’t go out to lunch on a workday (or ever) and eat as much as I just did.
May 18th
5 Things I Assumed I’d Have A Year After... →
whiskeybentandhellbound: (Or two, as it may be) 1. Fancy food in the fridge. I used to think that around this stage, I’d be cooking for reals — dog-tagging pages in hard-cover recipe books, tossing fresh herbs around, owning a cheese grater, things like that. As it turns out, I do three things and three things only at my local Trader Joe’s: rob them of their frozen food supply, spend 20 minutes...
May 18th
30 notes
May 18th
6,877 notes
May 17th
20,803 notes
May 17th
2 notes
Food is what makes office life bearable.
I need a snack drawer in my office.
May 16th
2 notes
Today I will:
Sit up straighter. Be thankful I am employed. Remember to smile. Do my laundry. Get some vitamin D.
May 16th
9 notes
May 16th
232 notes
May 16th
6 notes
1 tag
Cookie cake is cooking.
May 16th
5 notes
4 tags
May 15th
49 notes
“I’m (expletive deleted) starving.”
– Celebrity chef Mario Batali • Discussing the diet he’s currently on — he’s eating like he’s on food stamps (an average of $1.48 per meal, or $31 per week) in protest of potential cuts to the federal food stamps program. His family was nice enough to join him in what he calls a conversation starter...
May 15th
5,283 notes
3 tags
Updates and other miscellany
Today, Chris got an offer for a summer job IN PITTSBURGH doing exactly what he wanted to do. He gets major kudos for only having a few minor “I hate everyone”/ “I’m going to drink so much tequila that I almost die” moments during the first year of business school when all that anyone talked about was what their summer job was going to be, starting in...
May 15th
3 notes
May 14th
11,684 notes
Just booked my flight for the Cape in August!
Bring on the sun, sand, family time, wine, puzzles and Four Seas.
May 14th
2 notes
May 14th